第10章

And in the course of this he had also hammered out a philosophy of life, an ugly and repulsive philosophy, but withal a very logical and sensible one from his point of view.When I asked him what he lived for, he immediately answered, 'Booze.' A voyage to sea (for a man must live and get the wherewithal), and then the paying off and the big drunk at the end.After that, haphazard little drunks, sponged in the 'pubs' from mates with a few coppers left, like myself, and when sponging was played out another trip to sea and a repetition of the beastly cycle.

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'Wimmen!' He thumped his pot upon the bar and orated eloquently.

'Wimmen is a thing my edication 'as learnt me t' let alone.It don't pay, matey; it don't pay.Wot's a man like me want o' wimmen, eh? Jest you tell me.There was my mar, she was enough, a-bangin' the kids about an' makin' the ole man mis'rable when 'e come 'ome, w'ich was seldom, I grant.An' fer w'y? Becos o' mar! She didn't make 'is 'ome 'appy, that was w'y.Then, there's the other wimmen, 'ow do they treat a pore stoker with a few shillin's in 'is trouseys? A good drunk is wot 'e's got in 'is pockits, a good long drunk, an' the wimmen skin 'im out of 'is money so quick 'e ain't 'ad 'ardly a glass.I know.

I've 'ad my fling an' I know wot's wot.

'An' I tell you, where's wimmen is trouble- screechin' an'

carryin' on, fightin', cuttin', bobbies, magistrates, an' a month's 'ard labor back of it all, an' no pay-day when you come out.'

'But a wife and children,' I insisted.'A home of your own, and all that.Think of it, back from a voyage, little children climbing on your knee, and the wife happy and smiling, and a kiss for you when she lays the table, and a kiss all around from the babies when they go to bed, and the kettle singing and the long talk afterward of where you've been and what you've seen, and of her and all the little happenings at home while you've been away, and-'

'Garn!' he cried, with a playful shove of his fist on my shoulder.

'Wot's yer game, eh? A missus kissin', an' kids clim'in', an' kettle singin', all on four poun' ten a month w'en you 'ave a ship, an'

four nothin' w'en you 'aven't.I'll tell you wot I'd get on four poun'

ten- a missus rowin', kids squallin', no coal t' make the kettle sing, an' the kettle up the spout, that's wot I'd get.Enough t' make a bloke bloomin' well glad to be back t' sea.A missus! Wot for? T' make you mis'rable? Kids? Jest take my counsel, matey, an' don't 'ave 'em.Look at me! I can 'ave my beer w'en I like, an' no blessed missus an' kids a-cryin' for bread.I'm 'appy, I am, with my beer an' mates like you, an' a good ship comin', an' another trip to sea.So I say, let's 'ave another pint.Arf an' arf's good enough fer me.'

Without going further with the speech of this young fellow of two and twenty, I think I have sufficiently indicated his philosophy of life and the underlying economic reason for it.Home life he had never known.The word 'home' aroused nothing but unpleasant associations.In the low wages of his father, and of other men in the same walk in life, he found sufficient reason for branding wife and children as encumbrances and causes of masculine misery.An unconscious hedonist, utterly unmoral and materialistic, he sought the greatest possible happiness for himself, and found it in drink.

A young sot; a premature wreck; physical inability to do a stoker's work; the gutter or the workhouse; and the end,- he saw it all, as clearly as I, but it held no terrors for him.From the moment of his birth, all the forces of his environment had tended to harden him, and he viewed his wretched, inevitable future with a callousness and unconcern I could not shake.

And yet he was not a bad man.He was not inherently vicious and brutal.He had normal mentality, and a more than average physique.His eyes were blue and round, shaded by long lashes, and wide apart.And there was a laugh in them, and a fund of humor behind.The brow and general features were good, the mouth and lips sweet, though already developing a harsh twist.The chin was weak, but not too weak; Ihave seen men sitting in the high places with weaker.