Respect—in any Language

You cannot respect and honor others unless you respect—even celebrate—the differences between people. Can you imagine how ineffective (and boring) your team would be if everyone thought the same, looked the same, believed the same, had the same talents? Most of us readily accept the notion that diversity of talent and perspective strengthens a work group and contributes to excellent results. Yet if we are honest, we admit that differences also get in the way. The hard truth is that many of us more often tolerate than celebrate differences.

The Museum of Tolerance in Los Angeles welcomes its visitors in a unique way. As tour groups form in the lobby, they are invited into a waiting room that admits them into the museum. Our tour guide said to us, “Notice that there are two doors through which you may enter this museum. One is marked ‘prejudiced’ and the other is marked ‘unprejudiced.’ You may enter through whichever door represents you.” There was a long pause as people pondered what they should do, which door to choose. Finally, a man bravely stepped forward and turned the knob on the door marked “unprejudiced.” A few stepped forward to follow him, while the rest of us watched. He turned the knob, looked a little confused, and then turned red with embarrassment as he realized the door was locked. We could only enter the museum through the door marked “prejudiced.”

—Sharon Jordan-Evans

Which door would you have chosen? How would you react to the locked door? We all need to take a good look at our preferences and prejudices, our leanings. We all have them. They pop up when we mentor and coach, promote, reward, punish, and hire (research shows we are most apt to hire someone like ourselves). Once you take note of your leanings, you can begin to see the impact they might have on your employees.

Museum of Tolerance designers assumed that we all carry prejudices. The issue is how we respond. The first step in leveraging differences is to take a good look at your own beliefs. How much do you respect people who are very different from yourself? Do you value what they bring to your team? How sincerely do you want them to stay?

Managers must have multinational skills. They will have to work shoulder to shoulder with people from many nationalities in the global village of the twenty-first century. They must understand them, speak to them, cooperate with them, manage them effectively, not lose out to them, yet like and praise them. These are our cultural challenges.

— Richard Lewis, author of When Cultures Collide: Leading Across Cultures

When people get their backs up about diversity, often they’re resisting what they see as an effort to change how they feel. Valuing differences does not force you to change how you feel. It may persuade you to change how you act at work to keep good employees.

Remember that there is no genetic predisposition to bias; no bias gene rides on your chromosomes; no DNA test can identify who is biased and who is not. Bias is learned. It’s an acquired habit of thought rooted in fear and fueled by conditioning and, as such, can be unacquired and deconditioned. That’s good news because no one can afford to allow his or her distorted vision to interfere with the ability to function effectively, fairly, and successfully in increasingly diverse workplaces.

—Sondra Thiederman